Dating an "MPA" Girl why not!! MPAsquared. lol

[Heidi S]

That's EXACTLY how I look at this.

Some say some necessity forced them into this business. If you're healthy, single and 20 and have no dependents, I see no necessity other than the desire for a luxurious life to take on a life that is quite honestly, looked down on. Strippers tell me how they will sometimes come to work to work a short shift (and give blow jobs) just to make $$ to go clubbing that night. Or want a Maserati or get rich by "investing in RE". They tell me that even when they get a regular job, they'll come back to dance (and what else?) to make money.

Point being: the character flaw is the unwillingness to take a tough and slow path in bad times. The potential unwillingness to look beyond immediate gratification. The potential inability to separate right from wrong (obviously that decision ability was missing when entering the sex trade).

On the first page I made a mention about a "moral compass"...I think you gave it depth by clarifying it.

 

[360]

To Be................................................
Or not to Be........................................
That should be the question.

I just confused myself even more....

You may continue,lol.

 

[Mistress Mayhem]

hey now MM, dont disappoint me...you KNOW its not always about money....but with THAT guy, and that attitude...thats all he has.

 

[Rainbow Child]

LOOOOL!! Im a pain in the ass as much as the next gal/guy. Some men are intimidated by indy women. If I bring more to the table than he, I win hands down. Thats not fun. I should correct my statement...I find it hard to date men my age. I tend to over power. Oh and for the record, I can be a total bitch, but thats not what strong women should be about. Bitchiness is useful in small doses. Stomping around the world being a bitch gets you no where.

And as for my real world titles...I have and currently do hold some surprisingly important roles. If you ask a regular, I openly divulge that info.

 

[stacie]

I think that is an unfair assumption. You dont know someones reasons for being in the biz. Nor is what they may tell you entirely the truth. My reasons, for example, are highly personal ones. My closest clients know where my money goes, but its not something I whine about either. I have used it for good purposes, education, health care, etc. Not all of us drive flashy cars and wear brand names. Or suck dick to go clubbing (as you so lovingly put it).

What say you about your "character flaws"? The married men, the one with a SO. Does that make them/you immoral? Or simply human? How do you excuse your hobby and allow yourself to pass such judgements?

 

[Shandi]

Ok but why is ok for you to be a customer and I can't be an attendant??

 

[bittysmom]

.... No - so not accurate.

I really like a lot of my clients. I have known a big portion of my "regular" clientele for years; a certain type of bond develops - friendship, caring, comfort, respect... whatever.

I don't judge them or question their moral compass for walking into a massage parlour but...

I would never date a client.

There are a lot of good-looking, intelligent, open-minded, single guys that walk into massage parlours... but ask 9.75 out of 10 attendants and they will say:

- "if I met him elsewhere, I'd date him but... I met him here."

It's a variety of factors I suppose but my reasons:

- I don't want to date a guy looking for an ego-boost: the guy that scored free sex from a girl who charges for hjs....
- I don't want to date a guy who may have had a session with a friend of mine
- I don't want to date a guy who's okay with what I do.
- I don't want to date a guy who's going to be constantly stressing about what I'm doing at work because he knows what the worse-case scenerio could be - since he's had enough sessions to know what I could be doing.
- I don't want to start off a relationship backwards.
and....
- despite the fact that I consider myself to be very open-minded and far-less naiive than the average woman.... At the end of the day, I hope that the guys I date/marry will not go to massage parlours. I want monogamous relationship just like most women....

If he's going to chose between an affair, seeing escorts, going to strip clubs, or going to massage parlours, I hope he ends up in a spa - but he damn well better hide it from me and from people who know me; it's a matter of respect.

Yeah - I know I'm going to be called a gigantic hypocrite over that comment. Especially considering what I do for a living.... It's difficult to explain.

Even though I might like my clients, I might be open with my clients, I preform sexual services for clients... but there's some sort of self-protection mechanisim that's developed inside me that lets me differentiate between how I think and feel for my clients vs how I think and feel about guys I meet in the "real world". Things feel different when I'm not at work.

Maybe that bursts a few bubbles - I'm sorry if that is the case.

I don't think men can understand how we turn that part of ourselves off. I've been in relationships during my "career" and I've had relationships end because they couldn't handle my job. I have had arguements over whether or not I was cheating. I honestly feel that because that part of me is turned off and because I'm not at work due to the fact that I'm a crazy-horny, insatiable skank, and I'm not out seeking sexual encounters for self-gratification, that I'm not cheating.

This is one of those things that you kinda have to have experienced in order to understand; but I'm sure most women working in the industry would get what I'm saying... I think this "on/off switch" thingy is what makes it possible for some women to handle the sex industry and some shudder at the thought.

Muffin Muncher - the reason why I disagree with you is because it's really not about losing a regular customer. It's simply that I would never consider entering into a relationship from the moment he walked through the door.

 

[splash]

Dont get confused MPA2...

I was talking from my personal social love life that DOES NOT INCLUDE MPAs and SPs.

I pay them to leave MPA2... If I want a "deep connection" I'll seek out a real relationship

 

[Mary P]

See, one thing that makes me stubborn, is I won't put up with bitching. If that is any sort of habitual behaviour, the game is over. You want someone as strong as you are, but you bring stuff to the table that YOU would never put up with. How is that going to possibly work? You can't have it both ways.

 

[Mollay]

Im sending you a PM about my main reason, Im hoping you will recant this after.

 

[Pompal 09.]

You're taking it personally, I thought we had a spirit of honesty and openness going on here.

In my case, I am single, relatively young (aka "yuppie" ) and very much cognizant of the fact that I have spent too much time at strip clubs --- a lot of my own girl friends would consider me "damaged goods". But I am not cheating on anyone. As to married men or ones otherwise engaged, yes, I consider them to have a problem and for myself would NEVER want to be that kind of a guy.

What I told you about dancers; those are very honest admissions. Your reasons might be very different...but the dancers who told me this...they're young, they admit they want to make a LOT of money and want the nice things and a luxurious lifestyle that only stripping WITH extras will get them. They tell me about their friends who show up for 2-3 hours just to make money to go out clubbing (I didn't dream that up).

So when I compare this with the regular girls I know who're slogging at work, can you understand why I consider the sex worker group to have some sort of a character flaw?

 

[Kevin G]

Is that why you remain single?

 

[garlo7]

LOL! No. Totally un-related to SCs or Anything-on-massageplanet.net reasons.

 

[SKULLCANDYFREAK]

...was stunningly honest, and for the most part confirms many of the assumptions I have about sex workers.

Yes, you are being hypocritical. So what? People kill me with this notion that it is so wrong to "judge" people, or to be hypocritical. If I am making a decision about who I want to involve in my life on a personal level, I get to use whatever criteria I damn well see fit.

This one in fact is VERY telling...

"- I don't want to date a guy who's okay with what I do. "

...but very honest, and to me at least, very obvious. It is simply to converse of all the "would you date / marry a stripper / MPA / escort" arguments ad finitum. You know, the ones where some guy is honest enough to say "no", and then 3 dozen people jump on him for being a "hypocrite" and "judgmental"

Now, personally, I am not as strict as you. I would "date" someone in these professions. But "date" is all that is going to happen. Good times...both in an out of bed. And when it quits being fun, it quits being.

But yeah, I have to agree with you from a relationship stand point - my perspective would be almost exactly the same as yours, from the other POV.

One question though....

"If he's going to chose between an affair, seeing escorts, going to strip clubs, or going to massage parlours, I hope he ends up in a spa - but he damn well better hide it from me and from people who know me; it's a matter of respect"

...why SPAs versus strip clubs? I'd think the order would be reversed. My wife never had a problem with me going to strip clubs...indeed, she liked it, because she was almost assured to get laid when I got home half drunk and horny. Of course...I don't think she knew the shit that goes on in some GTA strip clubs...at least not until near the end, when she started trolling this board. But I also believe she knew me well enough to know I would never indulge in the "menu"....and that ain't because I am mister angelic. I just am not interested in intimacy in an open room with a bunch of others guys watching from a gal who has done the same things with handful of guys already today....without a shower or anything else in between.

Given your shared perspective...I'd think you prefer upscale no extra strip clubs versus "you know why he is here" SPAs....

 

[Brack_871]

Translation: I have never dated anyone but losers.




Translation: Even though I know it's wrong, I like to "overpower" the losers I date by being a total bitch. So much that they leave me.




Translation: I was the employee of the month at Wendys last month and everyone, including me was surprised. I told Disturbia and we had champagne in the room.

 

[Amerikan Pirat]

I never dated an MPA but I did date a dancer and I was okay with it in the beginning. She said she was going to leave the business so I waited, when I realized she wasn't going to quit it did start to bother me. Unless you're a true swinger, I don't see how it wouldn't bother you if you love the other person. I guess I'm not as open as I thought I did seek her out a couple of years later and she had not changed so I moved on for good.

 

[mex.reyes]

My point is that we ARE regular girls...students, artists, mothers, entreprenures, business owners, etc. Some of us are out there slogging just like everyone else. Or slogging a bit less because we dance/massage/hook. So no, I cant understand why you ball us all up in some Ferrari-driving-coke-snorting-shopaholic group. We could in turn ball you all into asshole-dirtbag-horny-pervy-mofo's....but we dont! You are living breathing feeling bj-craving red blooded males...harmless, kind, generous souls with wisdom and laughter to share.

 

[badspeller]

Thanks

Well... I have never had an issue with my boyfriends going to the ballet with the guys.
I would have an issue with my significant other going to the ballet, indulging in the menu options and/or making a fool of me in a public place....
I've free-lanced a few times in strip clubs... I hated it - and I've read enough/heard enough to know that if a guy is going to do more than watch the show.... I want him to be behind closed doors with a girl who's washed her hands.

 

[balloon buster]

Girls sell sex, boys sell drugs.

 

[bluasakura]

It's not ok. I admitted a lot of girls would consider me screwed up. My friend's wife tells him not to hang out with me much.