Thoughts on First Trimester Pre-Natal Massage?
Lanna said:
katamay said:
If I don't want to work with someone, I say something similar to: "Many pregnant women get a little crazy, and I wouldn't want to jeopardize our current relationship/am not comfortable putting myself in that position just because your/while hormones were/are raging."
Am I the only person who would find that incredibly insulting?
If a therapist doesn't want to work with me, they should just tell me so. Questioning my mental health is not the way to do it!
Kat
I can't imagine having someone deny me services because they think I'm hormonal and crazy. If someone did question my sanity while I was hormonal (pregnant, menopause, pms, just in a pissy mood), OMG my response would be sarcastic and seething with rage. I would be sure to vent to all my friends and possibly strangers too.
A couple of things here. As I mentioned, when I make a statment such as this, it is with someone I already have a relationship with. If someone is just calling my office for the first time, I do not take pregnancy cases.
In context, this means the person already knows me. That means our relationship is one where I can be frank.
It has been my experience that a pregnancy can go any which way. I have found my pregnant clients to have a higher sense of smell, heightened potential for just about anything to be taxing on their nerves (
be it lighting too bright or too dim, noticing tea candle tins in the trash can that are "bothersome", being disturbed that the hanging candle votives are swaying slightly after the candles have been lit in them, stress for the inability to get to the office on time, too hot/too cold, etc.). All of these are workable scenarios, but it does mean the therapist has to be vigilent above and beyond the normal day to day specifics of running an office. Since I am already on "high alert", this means I am on "ultra high alert". I am not always the best at nurturing (
it really depends on the person). So ,since I know this about myself, I can be straightforward about the whole thing. As a few of my clients have told me while *laughing*, about some things I say... "You can say things in a way that it doesn't even sound offensive... but, if another person were to say it, I might be shocked" (
or similar). It's boils down to personality and inflection.
When I work on a pregnant woman, I pull out all of the stops. That includes the little things like blocking out about 45 mins. prior to their scheduled appointment and about 1 hour afterward (
in order to account for any issues with getting too the office--- such as I don't want them standing around waiting in case they arrive too early and I want to have enough fudge space in case they weren't able to make it anywhere near on-time, which can be expected for at least a handful of their appointments due to a variety of issues).
I always discuss the potential of there being an issue and if I choose not to work with them, I say so. I have never had one of my preganat clients be offended by this. As a matter of fact, I use it to caveat into the awareness that if either of us find something going south at any point, I have a few people I can refer them to in order to keep the integrity of the original relationship intact.
I am not "questioning" anyones mental health.
Additionally, I am not here to be a clients punching bag. So, if anyone comes into my office "in a pissy mood" as Lanna notes, I can understand that. However, if it means that the client is being pissy
at me, I cannot. There is no reason for a client to act out in session. I don't put up with it in my private practice (
maybe that is why I don't have a lot of issues with clients - personally, I average about 17-23 a week and it all flows nicely... with people who are in good moods, they smile, are kind, not overbearing and appreciate good service in a straight-foward manner). But, if there are others who are comfortable treating individuals who act like that, please keep on keeping on. I am sure there is a niche for you.
Oh yeah, and if you respond to me "sarcastic and seething with rage", you can walk out now, because I won't be providing any more service to you. That means you are absolutely not a fit for my practice - we don't do that here. :lipsaresealed: